It was day gazillion in lockdown. I was flipping eggs again. Shooting up on low self worth, berating myself, ‘how the fuck did I get here?’ My go to phrase, you will come to learn.
In that moment I felt an affinity with this spatula! In that moment everything flipped, including the egg. Before I LOVED the spatula I LOATHED IT. It confronted me with my truth.
Overworked undervalued. First off blamed external influences, fucking Patriarchy, Boris fucking Johnson who is such a fucking Johnson and every other fucker who makes up the rules as they go along. The education system, if only someone had fucking nurtured me. Seen me. Now I am a mother, I have lost all I have worked for, Tim gets to have an hour in the car a day, lucky bastard and I get to flip these fucking EGGS and be at the beck and call of my children. Just called me Mrs Overall!
After I had finished my stampede through my mind. It dawned on me, I was the one who was overworking and undervaluing myself. No one had made me feel like that, I had made me feel like that.
What are my expectations? What kind of space am I needing? Do I actually already have it? What if I stop separating Mother and Artist and UNITE Mother Artist? What if my studio is my life? What if my Motherhood journey is my Art? Boom.
I suddenly saw the value in the spatula in my hand. I saw all the 'Mother's' before me all RAISE THEIR HANDS AND SHOUT YESSSSSSSSS SOPHIE YESSSSSS! Now pull your pants up and get on with the fucking job in hand. You have a message to deliver. So get on with it.
Watch my documentary Made in Womb on how I have priced myself as the most highly priced mother artist in the world.